Uncomfortable Labels

May 27, 2019
In this insightful memoir, Dale, a 20-something gay British trans woman with autism, explores the connection between gender dysphoria and autism. She laments that “it was never pointed out that the two might share any links, that fixing one might help relieve symptoms of the other, and that I might benefit from understanding the areas where my struggles could overlap.” As a child, Dale writes, “because I was already being bullied for my autism symptoms, the fear of being further bullied for expressing femininity, or rejecting masculinity, caused me to not tell people something felt inherently wrong to me about being male.” Instead, she self-medicated with everything from caffeine to MDMA and attempted suicide three times. When she finally pursued gender transition in her late teens, she found that the autism symptom of “touch-based oversensitivity” makes wearing makeup and many articles of women’s clothing a struggle and that the sensory hyperstimulation of gay bars and pride parades poses a challenge. The internet, on the other hand, is a “socialising goldmine” for LGBTQ people with sensory issues. Dale’s prose is charmingly matter-of-fact and conversational, weaving in asides on cats, video games, and her “favourite ever vegan chocolate cheesecake,” and she perceptively identifies the challenges she has faced and workable solutions for them. This hopeful and reflective account will resonate with readers affected by similar issues and inspire others.